I recall a discussion I once had with a client about choice. Choice, I said, is the only thing we really possess. Even when the power we hold over our daily life is minimal, we still have choice in how we respond to that powerlessness.
The discussion had begun over the topic of suicide, the ultimate choice that, paradoxically, reneges on itself once completed. And, viewed in that way, it cannot really be seen as a choice but an abstention of life. Choice engenders new choices; suicide cancels the vote.
On a smaller scale, we make parallel choices throughout the day. Every choice we make is a new pathway, a new fork in the road. The unchosen path dissolves, a metaphoric death, never to be seen in quite that way again. Sometimes we agonize over these choices, other times they are impulsive moments, forgotten seconds later. Regardless, we choose, and in that choice, we have power. Or we choose to abstain from decision making and we flow with known (or unknown) forces —a potential power in its own right.
Understanding the power of conscious choice is the basis for interdependent living. This fall I will teach three classes on the different manifestations of choice:
Codependence – the choice of living life in false hope
Boundaries – recognizing the choices that are ours to make (and those that our not)
Interdependence – the choice of responding (rather than reacting) to life
Check out the calendar of events on my website.